A Day Late and a Dollar Short: Grammarrrrrrr...

My real-life job consists of editing things. I translate Legalese into plain English. Sometimes, the lawyers try to translate my finished edits back into Legalese. And my boss is getting sick of it.

My Captain!Boss has been having a hellish tug with the legal staff over their insistence upon ruining all her comprehensible English. Specifically, with the use of bullets. So she carved the following upon a stone tablet and sent it up to them, along with thunder and lightening and the promise of wrath:

Plain Language Rule # 5,369.7

We do NOT punctuate bullets. They do not have:

• Commas



• Semicolons



• Periods

If you have a sentence that modifies a lengthy bullet, your choices are:

• Put it in parentheses



• Re-write the thought



• See me
  

This rule applies to:

• Doctors



• Lawyers



• Bureaucratic Chiefs

Sincerely,

The Grammar Goddess

She then printed out copies of this most-high commandment and slapped it on my cubicle wall.

I'm thinking she's reached the end of her tether...

Also, a follow up to last week's post about the Pennsylvania teacher who was 'outed' as an erotica romance writer.